Miscarriage

Discussion about miscarriage

I know I haven't been through this and it may be considered a cheek to actually be posting about this.. but if anything I like to share a few encouraging words for anyone in the future who would come across this.

A mother is not defined by the amount of children that she can see, but the amount of children that she holds in her heart. I know full well that my girlfriend and anyone else who has gone through what she has will eventually have their turn and be a wonderful mother. There are a lot of women who become mothers without any thought, patience, experience of loss and even though I can say that they are good mothers to their children what I can honestly say to my girl and anyone else is that you will be better. It won't have anything to do with money or matter of genetics, or the fact that you've read a thousand different baby books.. it will simply be because you have known struggle and have toiled with the different dilemmas and disasters which have thrown themselves in your direction throughout your life. You will be a better mother because you would have longed for this child so your ever growing want for a baby would have exceeded its prior limits and you will learn to appreciate motherhood so much more than what you had already anticipated. Like a lot of things in life, the people who have struggled with their goals and what they have tried to achieve turn out to be the people that deserve and appreciate everything so much more.

You can look at your miscarriage in a positive sense, that somebody has given you an insight into motherhood and what it would be like and therefore you will not be careless and will also be a better mother than what I or what anyone else knows that you already are. Your child no matter how early or late that it was lost, never knew cold, or hunger, it never felt alone. You held that child for every second of its life and for the whole of that time it always knew love. You carried that heart within you, so therefore you will never be without it.

And for all those narrow minded folk who wouldn't necessarily agree with my opinions of someone who has lost a child.. I give you one of my all time favourite quotes..

A person's a person, no matter how small. Dr Seuss.

Hlinfield93 wrote:I know I haven't been through this and it may be considered a cheek to actually be posting about this.. but if anything I like to share a few encouraging words for anyone in the future who would come across this.

A mother is not defined by the amount of children that she can see, but the amount of children that she holds in her heart. I know full well that my girlfriend and anyone else who has gone through what she has will eventually have their turn and be a wonderful mother. There are a lot of women who become mothers without any thought, patience, experience of loss and even though I can say that they are good mothers to their children what I can honestly say to my girl and anyone else is that you will be better. It won't have anything to do with money or matter of genetics, or the fact that you've read a thousand different baby books.. it will simply be because you have known struggle and have toiled with the different dilemmas and disasters which have thrown themselves in your direction throughout your life. You will be a better mother because you would have longed for this child so your ever growing want for a baby would have exceeded its prior limits and you will learn to appreciate motherhood so much more than what you had already anticipated. Like a lot of things in life, the people who have struggled with their goals and what they have tried to achieve turn out to be the people that deserve and appreciate everything so much more.

You can look at your miscarriage in a positive sense, that somebody has given you an insight into motherhood and what it would be like and therefore you will not be careless and will also be a better mother than what I or what anyone else knows that you already are. Your child no matter how early or late that it was lost, never knew cold, or hunger, it never felt alone. You held that child for every second of its life and for the whole of that time it always knew love. You carried that heart within you, so therefore you will never be without it.

And for all those narrow minded folk who wouldn't necessarily agree with my opinions of someone who has lost a child.. I give you one of my all time favourite quotes..

A person's a person, no matter how small. Dr Seuss.

Hannah, reading this heart felt message had me in complete tears, you sure do know how to tug those heart strings of mine lol. You have the ability to always put positives on a situation, to understand me the best that you can and to always be a shoulder to cry on when I am having a bad day.
Losing Pip was soul destroying and a little of me died with that baby. A lot of people will never understand how it feels to love someone so small without getting to meet them. No matter what anyone says I had so much love for that baby and I still love that baby even though he is no longer with me in person, I generally know hes with me always.
Being told you should get over losing a baby or it was never anything to worry about has been some comments I have unfortunately heard and that have been said to me by some inconsiderate human beings. That little baby had a heart beat, he was real, he was a baby and he will be sadly and deeply missed for the whole of my being on this earth.
This time was an all time low, I have been to dark places but I must say I have pulled through them. Life has not been easy for one moment, I have struggled with different dark thoughts but I am still here and living and breathing proof that even though an event can hurt so much its unbearable, time will make things more bearable. I am not saying the hurt will ever go away but I am saying that it gets a little easier, life does go on and eventually I hope I can prove to everyone the amazing mummy I can be when I eventually have a baby, however I am already a Mummy to a little Angel baby called Pip, and I love him with all my heart x